Gen Xer Lesson #1: Hard Work is Not Rewarded

So wikipedia defines Generation X loosely as:

. . .They possess only a hazy sense of their own identity but a monumental preoccupation with all the problems the preceding generation will leave for them to fix . . .This is the twenty-something generation, those 48 million young Americans ages 18 through 29 who fall between the famous baby boomers and the boomlet of children the baby boomers are producing. Since today's young adults were born during a period when the U.S. birthrate decreased to half the level of its postwar peak, in the wake of the great baby boom, they are sometimes called the baby busters. By whatever name, so far they are an unsung generation, hardly recognized as a social force or even noticed much at all...By and large, the 18-to-29 group scornfully rejects the habits and values of the baby boomers, viewing that group as self-centered, fickle and impractical. While the baby boomers had a placid childhood in the 1950s, which helped inspire them to start their revolution, today's twenty-something generation grew up in a time of drugs, divorce and economic strain. . .They feel influenced and changed by the social problems they see as their inheritance: racial strife, homelessness, AIDS, fractured families and federal deficits

Fractured families and federal deficits indeed.

I once read somewhere that the difference between a Gen Xer and Gen Yer was that Gen Xers still think their hard work can make a difference.

Sadly, I continue to work hard and believe in what led the Boomers to their hallowed lifestyle of a paid-off home and 2 cars in the garage (not including the sports car), two successful grown children and a healthy retirement from years of sucking it up for someone else.

So where am I in all this mess? No kids, wrecks for relationships, a house (barely paid for), one car and mounting debt to pay for bare necessities in life (yes, like food and clothing - remind yourself I am not a Gen Y who thinks cell phones and cologne are among life's necessities...)

Isn't it amazing that despite how low you stoop in life that any necessary drug dependencies will remain satisfied? That or obsessions. I thank God every day I walk this earth that my only crutch is the occasional beer or vodka, but I know folks who can't get through the day without that line of coke or Xananx or thoroughly beating their wife, etc. Nevertheless, the necessities are always satisfied, regardless of economic stature or intelligence.

I've never been able to decouple from this feeling of responsibility in life, regardless of how many mistakes I have made. In fact, they AMPLIFY my debt to responsibility. Why is it that others traipse by as if nothing they've done, nowhere they've setfoot, has ever resulted in a mess or embarrassment that they might wince at while waiting for a traffic light to turn green? I'm sure the guy walking the dalmation down the street has had his share of failure in life - but his stride belies it. And what do we make of the folks who always seem to be on the cell phone in traffic? Not always smiling, but placid-looking nonetheless.

This must be what drives us - a desire to be like "them". Even though "them" aren't really happy. I'd wager that 1 out of 10 "them's" are probably happy, the rest languishing in thoughts of not having enough money, or children, or toys or God Knows What.

As a terminal Gen Xer, I'd like to believe that my hard work will pay off one day. However, I am seeing evidence to the contrary. Lately, politics trumps just about everything sane, and the every-changing landscape of the Tech Industry forces you to remain flexible into your 30's and 40's. Something most Boomers wouldn't have shed a shit about in their heyday.

Here's lookin' at you, Roy.